I have a confession to make: I am in love.
OK, probably more like obsessed.
The man I love is tall, he’s brooding, he’s wickedly funny, he’s attractive, he’s mischievous, he’s enticing…oh, and he’s a vampire.
His name is Eric Northman.
He is a fictional character, and I am completely and totally hot for him.
The most distracting thing that could have happened to me during this time when I should be focused on working and preparing for grad school has happened: I discovered that my phone has an app for all of the Charlaine Harris Southern Vampire Novels (the books on which the series True Blood is based).
Now, I’m already obsessed with True Blood. And ever since Eric cut his hair (something that actually should be impossible for a vampire to maintain according to lore, but at least they’re not glittery daylight vampires *ahem*), I have been shouting at the TV for Sookie to drop Bill’s dark and brooding behind for Eric’s darkly comical, irresistible self.
It doesn’t help that the actor who plays Eric is just ridiculously hot. Seriously. I have read myself to sleep every night for the past four nights the way a person falls asleep on the phone with their newest infatuation, blinking sleep away and sighing softly, saying to myself nearly inaudibly “Oh, Eric.”
If only you were real.
I don’t know if it would make me sound any more or less normal if I could say this is the first time that I’ve fallen in love with a fictional character, but I can’t.
Anyone remember Animorphs?
Animorphs is the book series about the kids who were given the power to morph into animals to save the world from an alien takeover. My cousin T put me onto the series (he was good for that when we were kids, but I haven’t heard any recommendations from him in a while *ahem*) (I happen to know he subscribes to this blog).
Anyway. They were given the power to morph, but there was a catch: they had to go back to being human within 2 hours, or else they’d be stuck in that form as their original form (though I think they could still morph for 2 hours from there but I don’t know anymore, my memory of this is hazy now).
In the series, there was this poor unfortunate character named Tobias, who got stuck as a hawk. And somehow, between the fuzzy character illustrations of him on the cover of the book and his telepathic hawk-thoughts that the author had written in him, I developed this huge crush on this fictional character who was a hawk to boot.
What can I say? I like ’em when they play hard to get.
Last night I was thinking about this, and I started to chide myself about falling for fictional characters, but I stopped because it occurred to me that even though these guys were figures from books and movies, there were plenty of fictional characters walking around outside in broad daylight, and I couldn’t really see the difference between falling for them and falling for my book and movie guys.
I don’t date.
I have said that before.
I have a very unhealthy pattern of becoming enamored of guys way too soon and then tormenting myself with my own insecurities until it either chases them or ends in some other overly dramatic way.
At least I can recognize it, right?
Last night I was laying in bed and I was dreaming of Eric and I was kind of laughing at myself for being in love with yet another fictional character, when it occurred to me that people constantly redraw their characters in a more favorable light.
How is me falling in love with Eric different from me falling for the guy who paints himself as an understanding and compassionate listener, only to use the information I’d trustingly shared with him to try and get in my pants?
People do that.
And, for that matter, how is it any more or less sane for me to get carried away in my fantasies of the dark and brooding and very fictional Eric who, I was just sure, was capable of a deep and enduring love that he would bestow upon me and me alone as soon as I got him to give away my heart (according to hints that author Charlaine Harris dropped) than it is for me to get carried away in the hints that a guy may have dropped? Am I or am I not fictionalizing both of these characters’ characters?
All I’m saying is that there are plenty of fictional characters out there in the real world so don’t judge me for my latest love and I won’t judge you for yours.
- Fictional Characters Who Need Therapy (ask.metafilter.com)
- Fictional Characters Who Don’t Need Life Insurance (termlifeinsurance.org)
- ‘True Blood’ Stars: Season 4 Will Be ‘Crazy’ & Involve ‘A Lot Of Fighting’ (omg.yahoo.com)