Today I was talking to my dad about someone in my life who you could say is suffering from crazy thoughts. My dad told me that everyone had crazy thoughts; this person’s problem wasn’t the thoughts, it was that this person never developed that secondary thought that says, “wait. This isn’t such a good action to take.”
In solidarity with this person and those crazy thoughts, I thought I’d share some of my own crazy thoughts that occurred to me (disturbingly frequently and fluently) as I was walking around a local festival today.
Upon seeing a woman trying to balance two baskets of chicken tenders: I should knock those over.
Upon seeing a man stretching his arms upward: What if I just tickled that man?
And there were several others involving things like taking the leashes of leashed children and jumping in people’s photos (or knocking the cameras out of their hands) or just walking up to people and taking their hats/taking food off their plates.
And of course, la piece de resistance (or however you spell that): While in Wal-mart after the festival, upon seeing some beef jerky, which just happens to be a fave snack of a guy I used to be involved with: I should buy some beef jerky and put it on his doorstep. Turn some shit he genuinely enjoyed into a THREAT.
That’s the one I seriously considered, weighing out the pros and cons and eventually deciding that, if nothing else, it was just too not actually a thing I ought to really do in real life.
I’m just saying. We all have crazy thoughts. Or at least I have crazy thoughts. I just don’t act on them.